Rest In Peace

Not sure what to do with Wake/Funeral arrangements?

I recently lost a friend in an accident, but I wasn't exactly close friends with him (didn't hang out much). His wake is this Friday and his funeral the following morning. My girlfriend who also happens to know him through parties I've taken her to is planning some things. She's planning some floral arrangements as well as donation of money to go towards the funeral (he was young and married). I kept thinking about how certain things should be considered such as one's relationship with the departed and in turn how they contribute. I just feel like she's going a bit overboard (don't mean this in a bad way) considering her relationship with him. Wouldn't it be awkward? I'm afraid his friends and family will see what's being contributed and think "wait, who is she? do we know her?" What she wants to do is get me to tell all my friends about it who know him, and see what they think and if they can chip in -- but keeps saying that "she'd take care of it all". I just don't feel right. Help

Public Comments

1. If the family is needing financial help with the funeral then it's not a bad idea. It is kinda awkward that she is doing it all. usually someone real close to the family takes on that job. She needs to talk to the family and tell them what she has planned and see what they say first.
2. If you don't feel right contributing to flowers or a memorial fund for the family, then don't. I think what your friend means is that she is willing to be in charge of ordering flowers and putting together a donation, but is looking to your group of friends to see if anyone wants to contribute. If you don't feel comfortable helping her with that task, say so. I don't think that there is a specific list of things to take into consideration when considering whether a donation is appropriate. The family isn't going to say "who is she" but rather find some peace in knowing how much people care.